The stress that surrounds the holidays can make family gatherings uncomfortable. This is especially true in families with there is already some tension amongst family members.
During family gatherings, treat your family members with respect and try to focus on their good qualities rather than what has caused the tensions between you. If someone becomes confrontational with you, take a deep breath and tell the person that you will discuss things with them another time and that you want the family event to stay positive and focused on the spirit of the holiday season.
Making a plan about how you will deal with an uncomfortable situation will put you at ease and allow you to enjoy family gatherings.
December 3, 2010
December 2, 2010
Having a hard time deciding what toys to buy for holiday gifts?
The toy aisles are jammed packed this time of year and the number of electronic toys amazes me. Technology has become a big part of our lives and it's no different for children. However, I can't help but wonder what effect electronic toys have on children. I feel they inhibit creativity by not encouraging a child to use their imagination.
If you're purchasing toys for children this holiday season I'd like you to consider the following:
Blocks, traditional board games, Legos, puppets, art supplies, Lincoln Logs, a tea set, puzzles. Think back to the toys of your childhood. Which ones bring back memories? By giving a special child in your life a toy that doesn't require batteries you will be encouraging their creativity. Once the child has opened your gift, get down on the floor and play with them. You'll be creating new holiday memories for both you and your favorite child.
If you're purchasing toys for children this holiday season I'd like you to consider the following:
Blocks, traditional board games, Legos, puppets, art supplies, Lincoln Logs, a tea set, puzzles. Think back to the toys of your childhood. Which ones bring back memories? By giving a special child in your life a toy that doesn't require batteries you will be encouraging their creativity. Once the child has opened your gift, get down on the floor and play with them. You'll be creating new holiday memories for both you and your favorite child.
December 1, 2010
De-Stress the Holidays
The holiday season is here and your children may be bouncing off the walls in anticipation of holiday preparations, parties and the gifts they hope to receive. Even though they are exhibiting happy energy it can get out of hand.
An over-eager child might break ornaments while helping decorate the tree. They might drop the plate of cookies you baked for the neighbors or give away secrets about what's in the packages.
Resorting to telling them they'll be on Santa's naughty list might not be effective. Here are some suggestions for how to get things under control without curbing your child's excitement.
* Write down on the family calendar when special events will occur. This eliminates your child continually asking when it's time for the family gift exchange.
* Even with all the extra events, keep your child's routine as consistent as possible and make sure they're getting enough sleep.
* Enlist your child to help with gift wrapping. Just be sure to have an extra roll of tape on hand because kids love to play with it.
* Have your child make place cards for the family dinner or even help clean the house in preparation for guests.
* Suggest they play a board game or other quiet activity. This will have a calming effect and bring their excitement level down a notch.
When a squabble breaks out, start singing a holiday song. What child can resist a chorus of Jingle Bells or Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer?
As 2010 comes to a close do you find yourself feeling frustrated that your methods of discipline don't seem to be working anymore? Is your New Years resolution to find some new tools for your parenting tool box? Not sure where to start?
I can help! For the month of January I'm offering a Parent Coaching session at a reduced rate of $25.00 off the regular fee.
The session can be conducted by phone or in person at a time that's convenient for you. I will work collaboratively with you to find solutions to your most challenging parenting problems.
Just mention this blog entry when you contact me for your reduced fee.
Limited to one parent coaching session. Offer expires 01/31/2011
An over-eager child might break ornaments while helping decorate the tree. They might drop the plate of cookies you baked for the neighbors or give away secrets about what's in the packages.
Resorting to telling them they'll be on Santa's naughty list might not be effective. Here are some suggestions for how to get things under control without curbing your child's excitement.
* Write down on the family calendar when special events will occur. This eliminates your child continually asking when it's time for the family gift exchange.
* Even with all the extra events, keep your child's routine as consistent as possible and make sure they're getting enough sleep.
* Enlist your child to help with gift wrapping. Just be sure to have an extra roll of tape on hand because kids love to play with it.
* Have your child make place cards for the family dinner or even help clean the house in preparation for guests.
* Suggest they play a board game or other quiet activity. This will have a calming effect and bring their excitement level down a notch.
When a squabble breaks out, start singing a holiday song. What child can resist a chorus of Jingle Bells or Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer?
As 2010 comes to a close do you find yourself feeling frustrated that your methods of discipline don't seem to be working anymore? Is your New Years resolution to find some new tools for your parenting tool box? Not sure where to start?
I can help! For the month of January I'm offering a Parent Coaching session at a reduced rate of $25.00 off the regular fee.
The session can be conducted by phone or in person at a time that's convenient for you. I will work collaboratively with you to find solutions to your most challenging parenting problems.
Just mention this blog entry when you contact me for your reduced fee.
Limited to one parent coaching session. Offer expires 01/31/2011
November 29, 2010
I was a Guest on KMOX
I was a guest of Monica's Adams on her Health and Fitness show this past Sunday, November 28th.
You can listen to the podcast HERE
You can listen to the podcast HERE
November 8, 2010
Children and Chores
Do your children have chores? Is it easier to just do things yourself? In my work as a parenting coach I often hear parents describe how much time and patience it takes to allow children to do things for themselves. I remind parents that assigning children chores teaches them what's involved in running a household and that they're an important member of the family team.
Here are some guidelines for establishing chores with your children.
Choose age-appropriate chores
Choose chores based on your child's age and physical ability but don't underestimate your child's ability either.
Preschoolers can usually complete two simple jobs. As your child gets older they can be responsible for not only more chores but also ones that are more challenging.
Don't expect perfection
Your idea of how to properly make a bed is probably going to be very different from your four year old. Don't turn it into a struggle and don't resort to redoing what they've already done or they'll feel inadequate and resist helping out.
Be very specific
Instead of saying, "Clean your room," say "Put the books on the shelf, the stuffed animals on the bed and the dirty clothes in the hamper." Without step-by-step instructions young children often feel overwhelmed and don't know where to begin.
Put it in writing
Children often need a reminder to do their chores. A visual schedule with photos of your child doing each chore is an effective reminder. Hang it where everyone in the family will be able to see it.
Suggestions for age-appropriate chores for children
Ages 2-3: Put toys away, put clothes in hamper, fill pet's food dish
Ages 4-5: Make own bed, empty wastebaskets, fold laundry
Ages 6-7: Set and clear table, help make and pack lunch, sweep floor
Ages 8-9: Put away groceries, help make dinner, vacuum
Ages 10 and up: Cook simple meals with supervision, baby-sit younger siblings with adult present, change bathroom or change bed linens
If your child forgets or refuses to do their chores don't do them yourself. Remind them of what they need to do and if they're uncooperative then there should be a consequence. If children aren't expected to follow through they might start putting off chores hoping that you will do the chores for them.
Having children do chores might seem like more trouble than it's worth. Keep in mind that chores teach children responsibility, self-confidence and a sense of accomplishment. They learn that being a part of the family team includes contributing to the functioning of the home. This in turn will help them grow into responsible, independent adults.
Have you assigned your children chores but your children aren't completing them? Have you tried every approach possible and nothing is working?
Parent Coaching can help! Sessions can be conducted by phone or in person at a time that's convenient for you. I will work collaboratively with you to find solutions to your most challenging parenting problems. Email support between coaching sessions is included in the coaching fee.
Would you like me to speak at your next event? I'm a frequent speaker at parenting events, moms groups and educational programs. My topics include but are not limited to "Managing Challenging Behaviors in Young Children," "Positive Discipline" and "Helping Siblings Get Along." Contact me regarding availability.
Here are some guidelines for establishing chores with your children.
Choose age-appropriate chores
Choose chores based on your child's age and physical ability but don't underestimate your child's ability either.
Preschoolers can usually complete two simple jobs. As your child gets older they can be responsible for not only more chores but also ones that are more challenging.
Don't expect perfection
Your idea of how to properly make a bed is probably going to be very different from your four year old. Don't turn it into a struggle and don't resort to redoing what they've already done or they'll feel inadequate and resist helping out.
Be very specific
Instead of saying, "Clean your room," say "Put the books on the shelf, the stuffed animals on the bed and the dirty clothes in the hamper." Without step-by-step instructions young children often feel overwhelmed and don't know where to begin.
Put it in writing
Children often need a reminder to do their chores. A visual schedule with photos of your child doing each chore is an effective reminder. Hang it where everyone in the family will be able to see it.
Suggestions for age-appropriate chores for children
Ages 2-3: Put toys away, put clothes in hamper, fill pet's food dish
Ages 4-5: Make own bed, empty wastebaskets, fold laundry
Ages 6-7: Set and clear table, help make and pack lunch, sweep floor
Ages 8-9: Put away groceries, help make dinner, vacuum
Ages 10 and up: Cook simple meals with supervision, baby-sit younger siblings with adult present, change bathroom or change bed linens
If your child forgets or refuses to do their chores don't do them yourself. Remind them of what they need to do and if they're uncooperative then there should be a consequence. If children aren't expected to follow through they might start putting off chores hoping that you will do the chores for them.
Having children do chores might seem like more trouble than it's worth. Keep in mind that chores teach children responsibility, self-confidence and a sense of accomplishment. They learn that being a part of the family team includes contributing to the functioning of the home. This in turn will help them grow into responsible, independent adults.
Have you assigned your children chores but your children aren't completing them? Have you tried every approach possible and nothing is working?
Parent Coaching can help! Sessions can be conducted by phone or in person at a time that's convenient for you. I will work collaboratively with you to find solutions to your most challenging parenting problems. Email support between coaching sessions is included in the coaching fee.
Would you like me to speak at your next event? I'm a frequent speaker at parenting events, moms groups and educational programs. My topics include but are not limited to "Managing Challenging Behaviors in Young Children," "Positive Discipline" and "Helping Siblings Get Along." Contact me regarding availability.
November 1, 2010
PAT Workshop at the Clarkson Valley Early Childhood Center
I'm facilitating a workshop on Thursday, November 4th at the Clarkson Valley Early Childhood Center. If you reside in the Rockwood District I encourage you to attend.
The topic is "Managing Challenging Behaviors in Young Children." Here's a description of what will be covered: Children often exhibit challenging behavior when they don't have the skills needed to display more appropriate behaviors. This presentation will help parents understand why challenging behaviors occur and offer strategies to better manage those behaviors.
Click HERE for more information.
The topic is "Managing Challenging Behaviors in Young Children." Here's a description of what will be covered: Children often exhibit challenging behavior when they don't have the skills needed to display more appropriate behaviors. This presentation will help parents understand why challenging behaviors occur and offer strategies to better manage those behaviors.
Click HERE for more information.
October 28, 2010
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)