March 23, 2010

Do You Yell At Your Kids?

When your child doesn't comply or does something that's unacceptable does it push you over the edge and you react by yelling?

Is the yelling effective or does your child tune you out? If it's not effective why do you still do it?

Parents usually yell when they're feeling frustrated and stressed out. Parents who yell often have children who yell. I often have parents tell me they want their child to stop yelling yet they themselves are yelling. If you want your child to stop yelling you're going to have to reign in your own habit of yelling.

It's not easy to break the yelling habit but here are some suggestions:

Know what triggers your yelling. If your child's messy room sets you off then have a plan for what you will do and say the next time you lay eyes on the mess. Close the door so you can't see it. Then, when you've calmed down, speak to your child about cleaning up the mess.

Leave the room. If siblings are squabbling and you normally yell at them to stop, take a deep breath and leave the room.

Talk in a soft voice. Sometimes when you use whispering instead of yelling your kids will pay more attention to you.

Think about how you want your child to remember you. Do you want your kids to remember you as a mom who yelled all the time or as a mom who was calm and in control?

Are you a yeller and if so does it work for you?

If you're a recovering yeller what advice can you offer moms who are trying to quit?

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